ON Track

I have to get back on track with my eating. I walked 15 minutes tonight at mom's with Hannah, Richard and Zach. I only ate a little at mom's instead of eating like I usually do. I just still feel like I am hungry....is it all in my head???? I don't know. I will get through this...I am stronger than this disease!!!

I lost weight!!!

Can you believe that??!!??!!

Although it was only 2 lbs but have you ever seen a pound of fat?? It is huge!! So 2 lbs is a great start. In my book anyway. I go back to Dr. Burroughs for my 2nd month weigh in on Valentine's Day. Dr. Avara told me that I need to lose 15 to 25 lbs before I have the surgery. I know that I can do it. :-) I am strong.

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Hannah, Richard, Zach and I went to watch "Meet the Spartans" in Daphne last night. It was an awful movie. It was only 1 hour and maybe 10 minutes long. It was not something that I should have taken Zach to see. However, he laughed a couple of times at some funny stuff. I had to turn his head one time. He didn't want to but I made him.

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I have fallen off of writing down what I eat everyday, therefore, I have eaten things that I shouldn't. I am still doing pretty good with the cokes though. I had a half of one last night. Me and Zach shared it and a Snicker candy bar. I knew in my head that I didn't need to be eating or drinking it but it was like something that I had to do. And then when I was done I felt horrible about myself. I have got to get better with that. I have started a list of sugar free things that I actually like the taste of....sugar free chocolate pudding being the first thing on the list and sugar free Kool Aid being another. After the surgery I can't eat sugar anymore because it causes some people to have bad reactions to it.

Continue to pray for me and my efforts!!

SLP

BIRTHDAY NEWS!!!

First off as you can tell today is my tootbug's birthday!! He is 5 years old!! I remember like it was yesterday how everything went the day he was born. But we wont get into that. He had his 5 year old shots today too. He was brave until the end. He started crying because he saw his blood. He was supposed to go back to school and have a mini birthday party with cupcakes and juice but he said he didn't want to go back today. He went to sleep in my office at 1:30 and didn't get back up until 4:10. He needed the rest. It was traumatic for him. After work we went to pick up the cupcakes and then to McDonald's for his birthday supper. He ended up playing the game inside instead of going out to play.

Oh and the diet got thrown out the window because of McDonald's tonight. :-( I will get back on the wagon tomorrow.

More later!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACH!!!

Things could be worse....

First off a bit of good news.....I drank more water yesterday than I have in a long long time!!

Second....today sucks!! I looked at my bank account and I am overdrawn because my stupid bank took out fees for overdraft before they put my deposit in!!! And then I had signed up for a trial thing on weightwatchers and they told me that I had until today to cancel it or it would be charged $65....well guess what....they didn't wait they have already put it in!!!!!!!!!!! GRRRRR!!!! I am so frustrated right now I could scream!

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My baby's birthday is tomorrow!!! He wants to take cupcakes and juice to school for a mini party. After his doctor appointment tomorrow we are going to get that before I take him back to school. He is so excited so I told him that I would take him to McDonald's for supper also.

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Hannah, Zach and I walked yesterday. Zach kept saying his legs were hurting. Probably because he pretty much ran the whole way!! haha

SLP

More updates to my never ending diet!! :-P

I know I am probably boring you with what I eat but I think it is kinda helping me in my effort so here goes......

Yesterday I had:

3/4 cup of cereal with milk

homemade soup
peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread
crackers

Today so far I have drank 2 glasses of water. (a big step for me if you know me)

3/4 cup of Special K
1/2 cup of milk

Went to Old Mexico again today with Tracey!! I had a burrito, a chalupa, and a soft taco. I know probably too much but.....I don't want to deprive myself right now.

I can't wait till Friday to see if I have lost any weight!!! I am so excited!

Hopefully this afternoon me and Han will walk but she may have to work til 6!!

Continue to pray for me!!

SLP

FRIDAY!! 2/1/08

I love February for some reason!! It just seems like the month of LOVE!! hehe My son was born in Feb., mine and Chris' anniversary is in Feb., my moms birthday is in Feb., and Valentine's Day is in February!! :-) IT's just a great month.

Last night we went to Old Mexico Mexican resturaunt for supper. At lunch we went to Mockingbird Grill. Here is what I ate at both times:

Lunch
1 smoked chicken breast
1 cup cheese grits
20 or so fries
1 roll
16 oz of sweet tea

Supper
tortilla chips with cheese dip (:-))
grilled chicken breast
10 fries
a couple of bites of Mexican rice
tea

I am going to turn into a chicken. haha When I got home me and Zach shared a 4 oz container of yogurt (strawberry Mist)

Today when i got up I ate 3/4 cup of Special K Chocolatey Delight and 1/2 cup of milk

For lunch I had a turkey sandwich on wheat bread with 1/2 teaspoon of spicy brown mustard Pringle chips and 1/2 teaspoon of ranch dip.

I have got to start drinking more water!!! No cokes this week!! I am so proud!!

SLP

Stressed

Yesterday I went to pick up Zach to take him with us to the dentist so that we wouldn't have to get someone else to pick him up and the teacher tells me that she needs to talk to me in the hall.





This is what happened:





teacher: Samantha, Zach got his star taken down again today.





me: why?





teacher: He was wrestling with some more kids in the other class and wouldn't stop when he was told.





me: I know he and his dad do that all the time at home and I have told him that he needs to stop.





teacher: well i know that boys will be boys but he also interrupts me when I am talking and talks about his game constantly. He is one of the brightest kids in the class. I think he may be bored. He knows everything and that is why he interrupts me is to tell me the answer.





me: He learned everything that you guys are learning this year in his preschool.





teacher: well if he was my child I would take away his game and spank his butt when I got him home.





me: There is no telling what his dad is going to do to him because he has told him that he needs to quit doing all these things. I will take care of it.





Needless to say he did not get a spanking because it was late when we got home and I didnt want to spank him in the school parking lot because I don't want anyone to call DHR on me for spanking my child. I told him today that he needed to be better and not interrupt or talk about his game. He is grounded from the game until Chris comes back home unless he gets worse and then he won't get it back then either. UGH!! I feel like pulling my hair out.





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I asked Zach last night if he would like it if moma was skinny and his eyes lit up and said YES!!! That made me feel even worse about myself. :-(





Yesterday I had:





spaghetti


1 slice of wheat bread


tea


4 oz yogurt





supper:


grilled chicken sandwich from Mcdonald's


fries


2 bites of a fish filet sandwich


tea





At 6:30p.m. a BIG storm came through, I am convinced that it was part tornado. We ran and got in the closet because the wind was so loud and something hard was hitting the windows. After the wind died down a little we came out of the closet and had no lights because a transformer by our house got struck. We were the only house in the neighborhood with no lights. They finally came back on an hour or so later. In that time I was stressed so I ate a peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread. :-( I wasn't hungry I just knew that it was there and had to have it!! What is wrong with me?





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Chris has left again for a month. :-( I didn't want to see him go. He almost didn't go because he locked his keys in his truck and we have no spare key!! It cost $50 to get it unlocked!! Can you believe that? But we get it back because our insurance is paying for it!! YEAH!!





I made a virtual model of what I am going to look like at 170 lbs. -------> Don't I look cute? hehe





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I feel like some friends that I have are upset with me for some reason. After seeing/reading some things that I did this morning, I feel like they are thinking that I am not such a good friend to have after all. Who knows? Because I haven't done anything to make them feel that I was anything but loyal to them. I guess I was right in saying that my sister is my best friend and possibly my only true friend. She loves me no matter what and sees my faults but still loves me and even if I don't call her everyday or see her everyday she understands. If I don't feel like talking she understands. I am comfortable around her. She is my rock!!! :-) I love her!! I guess we only have one true friend in this world and sometimes it takes a long time to figure that out.

I guess I shouldn't get really upset about the whole thing because I really don't know if they were referring to me but it just makes me feel really bad that they would think that I was anything but a true friend to them. UGH!! I get too upset about everything.

Well continue to pray for me and all my many many stresses!!! :)